“So, basically, I’m like this meat in the ocean, and you’re the sharks.”

So saith columnist, Melville House author, and all-around great sport Owen Jones, in a recent video in which he finally comes clean about his ties to George Soros, Mosad, the CIA, and other nefarious shadow-conspiracies.

Thank you for your honesty, Mr. Jones.

Here’s the full, profoundly incriminating video:

Aside from the genial intelligence and good humor of this video, the award for Britishest summation imaginable of our current geopolitical situation goes to this sentence: “I think people will look back and go, I think we’re having a bit of a rough patch.”

(To those of you who are here discovering Jones’s youtube channel for the first time: You’re welcome! Especially also recommended is Jones’s video from last week parsing the term “alt-right.”)