October 11, 2017

I want to believe: Donald Trump traveled back in time to ghostwrite a pair of terrible adventure novels about how smart he is


Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States of America, as pictured in The Travels and Adventures of Little Baron Trump and His Wonderful Dog Bulger.

In 1889, Ingersoll Lockwood, lawyer and novelist, one-time ambassador to the Kindgom of Hanover, and son of Munson Ingersoll Lockwood, wrote a pair of novels following the fantastic escapades of Wilhelm Heinrich Sebastian Von Troomp, a brain genious and inveterate womanizer known to his friends and his dog Bulger as Baron Trump.

Smash cut.

In 2017, Donald J. Trump, racist landlord and vodka salesman, one-time owner of a failed football team, and son of a racist pimp, is inaugurated as the forty-fifth president of the United States of America. His youngest son is known to all as Barron “Little Donald” Trump.

Coincidence? Some people on the internet (a notoriously grounded demographic) think not!

As Jaime Fuller reports at Politico, the rediscovery of Lockwood’s two novels, The Travels and Adventures of Little Baron Trump and His Wonderful Dog Bulger and Baron Trump’s Marvelous Underground Adventure, has summoned a bout of exuberant speculation from commentors on Reddit and 4chan, some of whom take a handful of similarities between Baron Trump and President Trump as evidence of time-travelling shenanigans.

The Trumped-in-Time theory has been around since this time last year. The short version is this: Trump’s paternal uncle, John Trump, was a respected physicist and expert in X-ray and radio technologies. In 1943, the FBI commissioned him to review the papers and personal effects of Nikola Tesla after the legendary inventor died in a New York City hotel room. Uncle Trump’s official account is that Tesla’s papers were “primarily of a speculative, philosophical, and somewhat promotional character,” but wonderful internet weirdos are convinced that what Trump actually found were plans for a time machine, and that this technology was passed down to Donald Trump, who used it to engineer his unlikely success in the 2016 election. Also to go back in time and commission a pair of terrible adventure novels in which he is cast as an obnoxious (but real smart) mutant.

Seems pretty plausible, no?

No. Not plausible, according to Snopes, which gives the definiteve fact check on whether or not Donald Trump is a time travelling super-villain: “Although these books contain some seemingly bizarre coincidences, they are not evidence that Donald Trump has access to a time machine.”

Thanks, guys. We almost fell for that one.



Simon Reichley is the Director of Operations and Rights Manager at Melville House.